the thing about the past

"the only way to predict the future is to do it today...."

i'm forever stuck on this line. ever since, i have known myself as the advanced thinker--one who anticipates things in order to get what she wants. now i am trapped. trapped between looking back and looking forward. how is this so?

i have always believed that our lives work in a way that is compatible with what the Heavenly being up there wants for us. i believe that if we'll really look into matters occurring around, we'll see that they are really meant to happen. there are no ifs and buts in God's place in short words. that's it. we may screw up sometimes but honestly, our lives will not be perfectly well if everything is perfect everytime. yes. strangers are also friends we are yet to meet.they are the people who, eventhough seem so far off will eventually delve into a big current that is called 'our life'..... we may even think that some just arrived to hurt us or make us feel bad but the sense in their arrival comes from the fact they are really destined to hurt us.... and of course, teach us lessons.


why am i saying this? at times, when i look up in the sky, i remember someone whom i know will never think the same way again about the sky. soemtimes, i want to remember the past. sometimes, i want to reminisce the events which lead to the present; yet the painful thing about looking back is the fact that whatever you do, you just have what you call as 'memories'. nothing is left but the pure glimpse of your vivid imagination that you never really want to let go. and when you look ahead to that thing called future, what you'll see is just an incomplete you who's still yearning for that memory.. yearning for the realization of that memory once AGAIN....
now as i look at the place where i am standing, i realize that i can never really choose the direction i should face.... the road is so wide that i can't help but to search... and as everything changes between the lines, you just have to see for yourself.. you have to read for yourself......and in the middle of all these, you'll find that someone you know you'll always see in front.